Friday, December 18, 2009

Crunch Time!

Smoke'em If You've Got'em

This is it. The last shopping weekend before Christmas. One last trip to the bank for the holiday season. It's too late to make nice things for everyone on your list. You'll have to buy what you need, now.

That creation in the photo? Someone in the office thought it'd be nice to take some of their hothouse hibiscus flowers and adorn the mini Christmas tree on their desk. Perhaps we put too much rum in the egg nog.

Friday, December 11, 2009

Don't Play With Fire

Grande Mocha Latte With Emotional Blackmail

As a rule, I don't tip for counter service. Why should I? The service won't improve if I tip. The correctness of my order won't change if I tip. And given the fact that I'm not a student here, my grades won't change if I tip.

I specifically said "No whipped cream" and then they put it on anyway. I reminded them of this and they had to make me a new one. If I had tipped, would I have been able to retrieve my money from the tip jar? I'd have felt like a fool for tipping for the wrong coffee.

As a rule, college students are an emotional bunch. Finals is a time of great stress. I recall being in the throes of temporary bipolar disorder when each final would take place and the cramming began for the next one. If someone had caught me at the right time, I'm sure I'd have put more money in the tip jar than I spent on the coffee.

Putting this note on a tip jar on a university campus is wrong wrong wrong. Just because your job sucks and your pay sucks there's no reason to sink to emotional extortion on your patrons.

Thursday, December 10, 2009

Keeping The Kids Amused

Maybe he doesn't want to be found

My artist sketch lasted 3 weeks before someone tore it down. I don't think these people want their cat back.

The kids got a hoot out of this. Well, after I got the condescending glare from the oldest ones, of course. Then they made sure I took a photo of it.

So here's my critique of the sign:

1) Does the cat have a name? I might be able to get it if I called it by name. "Here, Puss Puss" might not cut it.
2) Boy cat or girl cat? Again, might not matter. However, if I'm to determine the eye colors of the cat, I'd have to be face to face with it. Then we're back to the name issue. I did see a white cat last week, but I couldn't get close enough to see the eyes. It ran away and I could see that it was a boy, but the sign doesn't specify beyond bi-color and white.
3) Do they want the cat back? According to the sign, they only want reports of sightings.
4) What's in it for me? I'm allergic to cats. They dig up my garden and knock over my bonsai pots. When my dogs chase cats out of the yard, they're knocking over the larger pots and making general chaos. So, if I'm to care about your cat, and right now I don't, how are you going to make me care? The sign does nothing to motivate me to do anything other than drawing a stupid rebus.

Given the lack of effort on the part of the sign poster (cheap sign, bad proof-reading, few details, no motivation), I think this cat woke up one morning to the sound of can openers in other homes. This cat realized that it had been staying with the wrong people. "These idiots haven't even given me a name," it muttered to itself. It struck out on its own and occasionally catches glimpses of it's former housemates from further and further away.

Would I report this cat if I could determine for certain that it was the cat from 2 doors down? No. I think perhaps this cat has chosen a better life. Who am I to interfere?